Amherst – Mary Ellen (Backels) Carlson, 80, of Amherst, passed away Saturday September 16, 2017, at her home surrounded by her loving family, following a long illness.

            She was born on All Saints Day, November 1, 1936, in Crosby, MN to the late Victor Adolph and Thelma Caroline (Johnson) Backels. She was the oldest of four siblings: Allen, John and Karen Backels. She moved with her family to Iron River, MI and Canton, NY, finally settling in Waterbury, VT at the age of 10.

            Mary graduated from Waterbury High School in 1954, where she was class valedictorian with a promising future. She graduated with honors from Upsala College in East Orange, NJ, in 1958.  She met her husband, David, at Upsala, and they were married on August 23, 1958 at the First Congregational Church in Waterbury, VT.

            Mary and David lived in East Orange, NJ and moved to Lindsborg, KS, finally settling in Amherst in 1964. Mary’s career was solidly rooted in the Amherst community, first as Circulation Manager at the Amherst Record, and then as an Application Specialist in the Amherst College Office of Admission, where she worked for 27 years until her retirement in 2005.

            Mary’s true vocation was as a servant leader in the Lutheran church. She was a life-long Lutheran and was a member of Immanuel Lutheran Church in Amherst since 1964, where she held several positions of leadership.  She was a member of the Council’s Executive Committee, serving two separate terms as Council President and one as Treasurer.  As Council President, she led Immanuel through a significant time of transition as the congregation searched for a new pastor.  Her final and most lasting contribution to leadership at Immanuel was as leader of the Worship Ministry Team, a position she held until her passing.  She led the team through a vibrant period of change and growth, implementing new ways of worship, advocating for the needs of those with disabilities, and extending a warm welcome to all.  In addition to her contributions at the local level, Mary served the New England Synod as Chair of the Synod’s Commission on Women during the time when women were first being ordained as rostered ministers in the Lutheran Church.

            Mary always said that music was her language.  An accomplished musician, Mary was a naturally gifted singer, and also played trumpet, organ and piano.  Her love of choral music led her to sing alto with the choir of Immanuel Lutheran Church, the Hampshire Choral Society, and the Pioneer Valley Symphony Chorus.  In addition to her choral contributions, she served as alto soloist at Immanuel and also played the role of wife in Immanuel’s production of Benjamin Britten’s Noye’s Fludde.  As one of Immanuel’s first choir directors, she carefully chose the music to enhance worship and celebrate her love of God through song. 

Mary took great pride in her family, partnering with her husband David to teach her children to be strong and independent contributors to society.   Mary was also proud of her Swedish heritage, celebrating many Swedish traditions, including the St. Lucia Fest, and hosting traditional Christmas Eve dinners. Mary loved to plan parties, both for her family and her church, and excelled at making every holiday and birthday special. She wrote a poem for everyone on their birthday from the family dog, Eddie.

Mary is survived by her husband of 59 years, David Russell Carlson, and her children, Kathryn, of Hadley, Daniel and his wife Carolyn, of Litchfield, CT, Claire and her husband Jack Czajkowski, of Hadley, and Peter Augustus “Gus” Carlson and his wife Jessica Carlson-Belanger, of Shutesbury; five grandchildren: Hilary, Andrew, Mary, Peter and Anna, all who were the light of her life; her brother, John Backels and his wife Marsha, of Salt Lake City, UT, and sister, Karen (Backels) and her husband Paul Carpenedo, of Erie, PA; many nieces and nephews, and her dog, Eddie. She was predeceased by her parents, Victor and Thelma Backels, and a brother, Allen Backels.

During her long illness, Mary was lovingly cared for at home by the palliative and hospice teams of the Cooley Dickinson VNA and Hospice, her family doctor, family, close friends, her Pastor and members of the Immanuel Lutheran Church Healing Ministry team, and private caregivers.

            Calling hours will be held on Thursday September 21st from 5 – 8 PM at the Douglass Funeral Service, Amherst.  The funeral service will be held on Friday September 22 at 10:00 AM at Immanuel Lutheran Church, Amherst, MA, followed by burial at Wildwood Cemetery.  There will be a reception at Immanuel Lutheran Church immediately following the burial.

            In lieu of flowers, donations may be made to Immanuel Lutheran Church, 567 N. Pleasant St, Amherst, MA 01002. “Those who wish to sing always find a song.” – Swedish Proverb